The subreddit “AITA,” or “Am I the Ahole,” is an online community where people can come and share their frustrations anonymously with strangers and get outsiders’ opinions on the conflict. The users of the subreddit then vote on who involved is “the ahole,” if anyone.
The woman worries if she overreacted after her husband kicked out her sister and baby nephew.
The woman shares that her 20-year-old sister had just gotten out of a bad relationship, so she and her husband both willingly opened up their home to her. She explains that, following the breakup, her young sister had been left with a 5-month-old son as well as mental struggles such as PPD and Depression. RELATED: Mother Considers Custody Changes After Her Ex Pierces Their Daughters Ears Without Her Permission The wife makes it very clear that, in the beginning, her husband was enthusiastic about letting her sister stay with them when she asked, and he even picked her up and brought her to their home.
Soon after her sister moved in, the husband began to see it as an issue.
The woman’s sister had only been staying there for two weeks when her husband began complaining about the new living situation, especially frustrated with their nephew’s crying, which the husband claimed, “causes him stress.” Understanding that babies are likely to cry, the wife didn’t really have much consolation for the complaints, but she “suggested he put on earbuds” to block out the noise. He suddenly dropped the issue, and the wife stopped worrying for a while. A week ago, she writes, she went out of town for a friend’s funeral, while her husband stayed back with her sister “to make sure she’s okay.”
When she returned home, her sister was gone.
She shares that her husband claimed that she had decided to stay with a friend, packing and leaving that morning. He even gave her a letter, claiming it was from her sister, but upon discovering all this strange information, the woman writes, “This felt so odd… especially after reading the letter.” Clearly, it hadn’t been a very convincing letter because she tried to call her sister several times until her husband “found” her phone that she had apparently “left behind.” Even her other relatives knew nothing of her sister’s whereabouts.
When she found out the truth, the wife was furious.
The day before she posted her story, the wife was called by an unknown number, and it was her sister. It was during this conversation that the wife realized she’d been lied to: her sister hadn’t left of her own accord but had been kicked out by her husband, telling her to “take responsibility for her own decisions.” RELATED: Dad Drops His 15-Year-Old Off At Mall Alone To Help Him Overcome His Social Anxiety, Sparking Debate In her post, she explains, “I was in shock as she explained that she’s not with a friend but at a shelter and she has no money.” She blew up at her husband when he got home, furious that’d he would do that to her sister and lie to her about it. Meanwhile, she explains, “he said I was being unfair and wrong to lash out at him for wanting peace in his home.” But she couldn’t understand how he justified his side, while he kept accusing her of prioritizing her sister over him, she felt that it was justified to keep their baby nephew safe at least. She didn’t want to leave them in the shelter, so she told him that she would pick them back up tomorrow, but he threatened to change the locks on their home while she was gone, saying her sister is not allowed back. Now, she is lost in the situation and closes with an update saying that she is going to stay in a hotel for the night and try to meet up with her sister and discuss a plan as soon as possible.
The verdict was: not the a**hole.
Unsurprisingly with this story, most of the Reddit users were far more appalled at her husband’s actions than the writer’s. Not only did they believe the husband to be “the ahole” in this situation, but many feared that he is far more dangerous than the wife could even be imagining. The top comment warns the writer of the post as such, saying, “He is a dangerous man. He threw a woman and her newborn onto the street without a care in the fing world. Now, he’s threatening to lock you out of your own house. You need to divorce him. Immediately.” This was a common thread throughout the top comments: many gave the wife more to think about than she probably bargained for. Whereas she was mostly just trying to figure out where he was coming from and if she had overreacted, many commenters pointed out that these behaviors from her husband should not be acceptable, no matter where he is coming from. One commenter stressed how untrustworthy he is for acting like this, saying “He went BEHIND YOUR BACK to do this to your loved one. He FAKED A LETTER. He HID HER PHONE FROM YOU. This is completely out of proportion to anything that happened. This was unwarranted cruelty and a breach of trust. Gtfo of that relationship. He will absolutely repeat that behavior.” So, it seems in this case, the concerned user might be dealing with something worse than an a*hole, but we can only hope the wife will take some of the advice being dished out and keep herself safe. RELATED: Mother Says Son Was Sold In A ‘Mock Slave-Auction’ Hosted By White Students At North Carolina School Amanda Hartmann is a writer and editorial intern at YourTango who writes on news and entertainment.